yesterday

yesterday the scale said: 146.2

which means that gain really was nothing, because after a day of liquid fasting (aside from breakfast) i had dropped 1.6 lbs by the next morning. so you girlies were right, it was just fluctuation/water weight or something else that didn't stick.

yesterday's breakfast:
oatmeal w/ honey and cinnamon (165)

yesterday's lunch:
nothing

yesterday's dinner:
errr.... see below

* * * * *

so when i got home from work yesterday, boyfriend surprises me with "hey guess what, we are going to my grandparents house for dinner". great, right? just freaking great. was planning on a salt water cleanse, now that's not happening. was planning not to eat for the rest of the night, now that's not happening. so we go over.

and it's actually not too bad. for dinner i had three grapes (10) three cantaloupe cubes (20) and two thin slices of roast beef (155). after dinner i was even pressured into dessert, but it was low-fat strawberry shortcake cups, and i didn't get strawberries with mine, so it was the low-fat cake cup (80) and a little bit of fat-free cool whip (20).

went to dinner with the family and got away with a 285 calorie meal, including dessert? not bad at all.

so, this is where it gets bad.

as we're leaving we get a text to join our friend at a restaurant for her 21st b-day. so we stop by. i wasn't going to get anything. i was being strong. i was saying, "i'm too broke to get a drink, i don't want to drink" all the standard excuses. then boyfriend buys me an appletini (175). i drink it, and get buzzed pretty quickly because i haven't had anything to drink in a while, and i haven't had much food.

and this is where it gets really, really bad.

i start eating. boyfriend has ordered a quesadilla and expects me to eat half. so i do (700). i drink another appletini (175). some friends have ordered cheese dip and chips, so i have some of that (300).

by the time we leave, i've consumed 1350 calories, in addition to the 165 for breakfast and the 285 for actual dinner.

1800 calories for the day. limit was 650. so i'm over by 1150.

i feel really crappy about the whole thing. i was doing soooooo good. i was so proud that i hadn't gone over a single limit for sgd. i've fucked that up now. i was so happy yesterday when i saw that my weight was back on track, that the gain had been nothing and i was down to 146.2. i'm in for another gain, that's for sure.

today's plan:

go to gym and burn as many calories as possible.

go to store and get healthy foods for week.

liquid fast for today (sunday), to bring down my weekly calories.

doing my saltwater flush tonight.

bit of good news: when i stepped on the scale just now, it said 146.6. i'm going to work out like i'm fucking training for the olympics to make sure that number doesn't rise by tomorrow. i will never be in the 150s again, it's not fucking happening.